Jester and the Jokes

A long time ago a grizzled and wise old policeman announced to a group of his colleagues: "The problem here is too many people treat this joke as a job." Actually, it was a few years ago, my husband was present and the policeman in question is not much older than my husband and not at all grizzled but the saying is continually springing to my mind at the moment.

I may have mentioned it once or twice: I work in a complaints department. The emphasis is on closing complaints by phone - it's quicker and adds the personal touch. However, we are unable to force our customers to make complaints by phone, they do frequently insist on writing in and we often have to respond in writing, although we prefer not to.

All of their letters are scanned onto our computer system and there is a useful little window where you can see the scanned image of the letter. There is an even more useful button in the window with a picture of a printer on it, which you can use to print off the images so you can read the letter and scribble notes on it. This is great when it works but at the moment it doesn't. Well, it does for a few. Well, part of it does for a few and all it does for even fewer.

On Tuesday and yesterday, I was one of the few people - about 5 or 6 - in the department (we number about 40 people at present) who could see the images. I was also one of the elite who could see the images and had the computer hooked up to a printer that works. We have three printers in the department; all Science Museum material: two of them work but only one of them is reliable. So I was very popular indeed.

Yesterday, they took one of our servers down for maintenance. I logged onto one of the other 3. Well, on the third attempt I did, anyway, and I could now no longer view images. I can still print, so I can write letters but I can't see my customers' letters. Oh and I can't attach my own letters to the complaint log. It transpires that view customers' letters and attaching ours run off the same piece of faulty software. We have to attach our letters to be FSA compliant.

So we, temporarily at least, had a complaints department where we were unable to see our customers' letters or, in the majority of cases, print our own. Which brings me back to the grizzled old policeman. I really do have to agree with him when it comes to the Dark Satanic Mill: Too many people treat this joke as a job.

One last laugh. Our hardware may date from ante-diluvian times and our software may be rubbish but at least we don't the laughable computer systems my husband has to work with. Yet again, the police beats the insurance industry to first place in the god-awful employers stakes.